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Best G-Rated joke?


Question: Best G-Rated clean joke, I especially like blue collar or redneck humor. Jokes from Blue Collar TV or the Blue Collar Comedy Tours are fine. Don't do You might be a redneck jokes, I've heard them all.
Answers: Real-life Rednecks
An East Texas couple, both real-life rednecks, had 9 children.

They went to the doctor to see about getting the husband fixed.

The doctor asked them why, after nine children would they choose to do this.

The husband replied that they had seen on a TV news program that one out of every ten children being born in North America was Mexican, and they didn't want a Mexican baby because neither of them could speak Spanish.
What's a red-necks last words?

Hey, hold my beer and watch this!
how do you get a professional poker player off your porch?

Pay him for the pizza
.... ----to a guy that made a tv show---

your tv show was so bad that christopher reeves got up and changed the channel...

no disrespect to christopher reeves.... (he was the best superman)
What did the pencil say to the other pencil?
You're looking sharp!
Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One muffin said to the other... You know what burns me? . The other muffin said... WHOA! A TALKING MUFFIN!
REDNECK JOKES

1.More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

2.You think the stock market has a fence around it.

3.You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

4.You've ever lost a loved one to kudzu.

5.Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

6.Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs.

7.You've ever used lard in bed.

8.Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.

9.You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

10.You've ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.

MANY more here:
http://www.zelo.com/redneck.htm


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